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Bog Standard

Toilet humor has traditionally served as the safe haven for daily publications, and we are always mindful to significant toilet tales and milestones, notably connected to soccer. Readers were entertained to learn that Big Website columnist a well-known presenter owns a West Bromwich Albion-inspired toilet in his house. Spare a thought regarding the Barnsley supporter who interpreted the restroom somewhat too seriously, and was rescued from an empty Oakwell stadium after falling asleep on the loo during halftime of a 2015 loss by Fleetwood. “He was barefoot and couldn't find his phone and his hat,” elaborated an official from the local fire department. And everyone remembers during his peak popularity playing for City, Mario Balotelli entered a community college to access the restrooms during 2012. “Balotelli parked his Bentley outside, then came in and was asking where the toilets were, then he went to the teachers’ staff room,” a student told a Manchester newspaper. “After that he was just walking round the campus like he owned the place.”

The Toilet Resignation

Tuesday marks 25 years since Kevin Keegan stepped down from the England national team post a quick discussion within a restroom stall alongside FA executive David Davies in the bowels of Wembley, following that infamous 1-0 defeat versus Germany during 2000 – England’s final match at the historic stadium. According to Davies' personal account, his private Football Association notes, he stepped into the wet struggling national team changing area right after the game, seeing David Beckham weeping and Tony Adams energized, both of them pleading for the director to convince Keegan. After Dietmar Hamann's set-piece, Keegan walked slowly through the tunnel with a blank expression, and Davies discovered him collapsed – similar to his Anfield posture in 1996 – within the changing area's edge, muttering: “I'm leaving. This isn't for me.” Stopping Keegan, Davies tried desperately to salvage the situation.

“Where could we possibly locate [for a chat] that was private?” stated Davies. “The tunnel? Crawling with television reporters. The dressing room? Heaving with emotional players. The shower area? I was unable to have a crucial talk with an England manager as players dived into the water. Just a single choice remained. The toilet cubicles. A significant event in English football's extensive history happened in the old toilets of a stadium facing demolition. The coming demolition was almost tangible. Leading Kevin into a compartment, I closed the door after us. We stayed there, eye to eye. ‘You can’t change my mind,’ Kevin said. ‘I'm leaving. I'm not capable. I’m going out to the press to tell them I’m not up to it. I cannot inspire the squad. I can't extract the additional effort from these athletes that's required.’”

The Aftermath

Consequently, Keegan quit, subsequently confessing he considered his stint as England manager “soulless”. The two-time Ballon d’Or winner added: “I found it hard to fill in the time. I began working with the visually impaired team, the deaf team, working with the ladies team. It's a tremendously tough role.” Football in England has advanced considerably in the quarter of a century since. For better or worse, those Wembley restrooms and those twin towers are no longer present, although a German now works in the coaching zone Keegan formerly inhabited. Tuchel's team is considered among the frontrunners for the upcoming Geopolitics World Cup: National team followers, value this time. This specific commemoration from one of England's worst moments acts as a memory that circumstances weren't consistently this positive.

Real-Time Coverage

Join Luke McLaughlin at 8pm BST for Women’s Bigger Cup updates concerning Arsenal's match against Lyon.

Quote of the Day

“There we stood in a long row, wearing only our undergarments. We were the continent's finest referees, elite athletes, role models, adults, parents, strong personalities with strong principles … however all remained silent. We hardly glanced at one another, our eyes shifted somewhat anxiously when we were requested to advance in couples. There Collina examined us thoroughly with a chilly look. Quiet and watchful” – previous global referee Jonas Eriksson reveals the humiliating procedures officials were once put through by previous European football refereeing head Pierluigi Collina.

Soccer Mailbag

“How important is a name? There’s a poem by Dr Seuss named ‘Too Many Daves’. Has Blackpool experienced Excessive Steves? Steve Bruce, along with aides Steve Agnew and Steve Clemence have been removed from their positions. So is that the end of the club’s Steve obsession? Not quite! Steve Banks and Steve Dobbie remain to manage the main squad. Complete Steve forward!” – John Myles

“Since you've opened the budget and distributed some merchandise, I've opted to write and make a pithy comment. Ange Postecoglou states that he picked fights in the school playground with kids he expected would overpower him. This self-punishing inclination must explain his choice to sign with Nottingham Forest. Being a longtime Tottenham fan I will always be grateful for the second-season trophy however the sole second-year prize I envision him securing along the Trent, should he survive that period, is the Championship and that would be some struggle {under the present owner” – Stewart McGuinness.|